Saturday, February 23, 2013

Progress report

You know, sometimes I just want to be the one girl who goes to class, goes to library during a break and goes home after that. It gets lonely but so what?

Friends, I whine that I don't have any to spend time with but i am not even bothered to reply a whatsapp message.

I get so irritated by so many things. My sister's new phone's whatsapp sound annoys the shit out of me. People who are late and drive slow annoy the shit out of me. Annoyed because I can't go on a holiday.

Have not been on point with my studies. Tax and management are such killer subjects but it's not like I have been putting in much effort either. Have been doing housework but not as much as before.

The person who I thought I know so well slowly becomes a stranger, day after day. I can't keep up with the pace of this person. It's like chasing after something I can't get, something that used to easily be in my hands. Sometimes I just wish I could unhear said words, words that sting so bad. Who am I anyway? I already know what this person wants right now. I should be happy for this person but I can't. Because this person is not the same person I used to know anymore. I should accept it but I can't. Because maybe plans have changed. I am not a part of what this person wants anymore. What can I do? Watch things fall apart? What about what I want? Is what I want wrong?

Fucked up.

I just want to be those rich ass bai ka zai who just need to spend my parents money and have fun everyday sometimes. Or maybe be a pet goldfish. All I have to do is eat and swim in a tank and shit and then die.

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